Journey of Anonomz

Last week, I finally watched the movie, “It’s a Wonderful Life” in its entirety, and it really got me thinking about my life and the impact I have made thus far.  If only “my guardian angel” would whisk me away and let me see what other peoples’ lives would be like if I were never born. Often, I contemplate about how productive my life is and if I am truly making a difference…regardless of how small or large it may be.  An adage that resonates with my spirit proclaims, “Leave this world better than you found it.”  After watching the movie, I sat pensively pondering, “Am I in alignment with this statement?”  This is one of my philosophical and spiritual musings that will sadly not result in a definitive answer, but it did get me thinking about all of the wonderful people in my life who may not even know how they have influenced me.

So, I thought, why not spend a little time creating a brief list of acknowledgement.  Unfortunately, I am fully aware that there are just too many people to name without potentially leaving someone out resulting in a negative impression.  Of course, my family, dear friends, former teachers, students and colleagues have played major roles in helping me become the woman that I am today, but sometimes those people who may appear to cause harm also play key roles into giving me the wonderful life I have today.  Here are three people out of many who have influence my life:

Linus: At a former place of employment, this man caused me insurmountable grief.  Even though I was a hard worker, he referred to me as “an exception to the rule” because he believes (I hope he’s since had a change of heart and that it is now “believed”) that most Black people are lazy, and women are incompetent and should not be in positions of authority.  What’s so wonderful about this man?  Actually, he served a few purposes.  Firstly, he opened up my eyes making me aware that racism and sexism do still exist and that I mustn’t lose sight of this and take a stand when necessary.  Also, he forced me to become a risk taker and to test my faith of believing I can do all things with God on my side by leaving my position.  Thanks to his disdain for me,  I am where I am today!

Pooh: My first boyfriend was slicker than a sheet of ice during the blizzard of ’96, but I was in love and thought he could do no wrong.  He had his good qualities, but he took advantage of my pleaser tendencies and attempted to manipulate me in a multitude of ways.  It broke my heart when I found out he was getting extra cozy with girls from the job (I helped him get) and eventually got a girl pregnant.  Yes, he’s Mr. Wonderful too, and I do not say this sarcastically.  Never did I hold future suitors accountable for his transgressions, but he did help me to realize what I did want and did not want in a relationship and how both people must have the same goal.  Partly because of him, I have an even greater appreciation for the love I’ve found.

Grinch: This man, more times than not, made me feel like I wasn’t good enough and only acknowledged me in childhood and adulthood when it was convenient for him. Even though I do have a handful of good memories involving him,  most of them make me wonder how I was still able to become the person who I am today.  It’s amazing how life works!  As a result of biding for his affection, I worked even harder in school and in my work life hoping to hear the phrase uttered, “That’s my daughter” coupled with “I’m so proud of you” without hesitation of who may hear it said.  Why on earth is he so wonderful?  Well, of course, my mother’s role in my life would undoubtedly eclipse his.  However, without him, I do not think I would have as many accomplishments in hoping that it would be enough to make him happy with me.

On the surface, these examples may seem depressing and not worthy of posting.  Nevertheless, if I am able to get beyond the negativity and people who could have potentially made my life miserable, then why not share it with others.  Do you have a person or story of how someone impacted your life and made it what it is today?  Maybe it was me…Please feel free to share it.
Best regards,

Tanya Harris aka Anonomz

Tags: Anonomz, Appreciation, Life, Musings, Philadelphia, Philosophy, Tanya Harris, Wonderful Life